The Science of Happiness — and How to Harness It Daily
What if happiness wasn’t something to chase, but something to cultivate?
A Moment of Innocence
One morning, my daughter, then six, declared, “I’m never angry. What does that even mean?”
She was doing a school exercise on emotions. Joy? Easy. Sadness, fear, even disgust? Sure. But anger? “I’ve never felt that,” she laughed at the thought of being angry, as if it was the most absurd of emotions.
I am not ashamed to say that it brought up many thoughts and feelings. As I sat there, it got me thinking of my own fiery (ahem, passionate?) nature, something my grandmother who is very proud of our Italian descent, once called our “birthright”, I felt the contrast deeply. I’ve long seen myself as passionate (sometimes to my own detriment that often has gotten me into trouble), but through years of meditation training, I’ve learned to pause. To breathe. To ask: What does happiness really mean?
What Modern Science Says
Happiness is both ancient and individual. The Stoics, Buddhists, and now psychologists have all explored it. Our happiness is largely dictated by the interplay between our internal operating system (mind, body and soul) and our environment. It is also knowing what happiness means to each of us, honestly.
We can’t be happy all the time, even my now 7 year old would confess to that. We can however start to notice what gives us a sustainable level of positivity vs those things that have us riding those high, high waves of joy. We also have to accept that we need to allow in the good and the bad so that we can have perspective. Yep, it’s back to feeling all of those feelings. What is certain is that you need a healthy contrast of experience, not just the highs but sometimes the lows, in order to bring perspective.
According to research:
50% of happiness is genetic
10–20% comes from life circumstances
30–40% is within your control—your thoughts and actions
t’s that final slice that’s within our control—and that’s where the magic lies.
Here are 10 science-backed (and soul-backed) practices to cultivate sustainable happiness, starting today:
Ten Ways to Cultivate More Happiness
1. Honour the Four Pillars of wellbeing: There is no substitute for the foundations of wellbeing. Sleep. Movement. Nutrition. Stress management. Nail these foundations, and you’ll create stability for joy to grow.Building successful daily habits to achieve these is an art form in itself. The very essence of structure and small achievements through the day can improve your level of happiness.
2. Build Self-Awareness: It’s very hard to pursue happiness when you have no idea where your current levels are sitting. How do you feel—really? Daily check-ins or journaling build emotional intelligence, clarity, and intention.
3. Pause Before Reacting: Learning to respond rather than react. Pause and take time to notice your emotions before acting on them; this is a form of 'mindfulness'. Techniques can be used to 'rewrite the story', by reframing negative experiences into positive ones. For example, losing your job, being made redundant can be seen by most as a disaster, but, and it can feel like a monumental but, however it is there - perhaps it allows for some pause, self-reflection, the opportunity to look for something that is more inline with what you want, with your values. Perhaps it can offer it can quality family time, appreciation for what we take for granted and a chance to reset our values. The psychological method to manage negative situations is called 'Learned optimism'. It helps to depersonalise the situation, recognise its impermanence and relative insignificance.
4. Know Your Strengths: Knowing and building on your own character strengths has shown to boost happiness. There are 24 character strengths based on values, culture and upbringing. You can identify yours here, use them to help align your work, hobbies, and identity with who you really are. We know that when you are living in alignment, the happier you are.
5. Use Positive Reinforcement: Smiling, affirmations, visualisation—these aren’t fluff. They literally rewire your brain for joy and possibility. Positivity is infectious, the more you smile and show enthusiasm, the more this will be reflected by those around you. I find that affirmations are hugely helpful to call in that positive reinforcement. It’s a way of building confidence and even rewiring neural pathways. Key if you are a believer in manifestation.
6. Find your 'flow': this is a concept used in performance and sports psychology, but has become far more common and is also tied in with many different creative activities. It’s what got me hooked on candles and working with wax. Flow, is a state of 'being in the zone', totally immersed and energised, where challenge and focus are in perfect balance. This can be related to any creative process, cooking, art, sports, or indeed focus at work. The more you infuse your life with periods of 'flow', the happier you will be.
7. Write it out: Either first thing in the morning or last thing at night, for 10-15 minutes. Writing down your thoughts, concerns, ideas or quotes. Self-reflection in this way has shown to improve mood, performance and sleep. I like to light a candle and write down all my worries and fears, first thing in the morning and then reflect at night on what happened through the day. More often than not, those worries never appear.
8. Gratitude: Every morning and/or evening, think of three things you are grateful for (simple moments, kind gestures, family etc). You could combine this with your journaling. Studies have shown this to have a large impact on overall happiness, in as little as two weeks of practice. Another way to do this is to take a photo a day, just on your phone. It’s amazing what happens when we seek out the beauty in the every day. We are hardwired to think negatively, this technique pushes positive thoughts to the forefront and can rewire our neural pathways.
9. Be Generous: Giving your time or money to a cause that is important to you (for a sense of meaning and purpose). It could be as simple as giving three compliments per day (I personally love doing this) or it could be giving money or time to a cause in need. Directing your own kindness to others increases your own happiness, despite feeling counter-intuitive. This has been well-documented in several studies.
10. Get Social: Now, I fully get that this may not be for everyone, but hear me out. the sense of connection is incredibly valuable. Loneliness and isolation has been associated with poor physical health. Simply giving someone a hug and general human contact releases the feel-good hormone 'oxytocin'. Going for lunch, coffee, a walk and a chat - these activities can have an amazing boost of connectedness and therefore happiness. Interestingly, the shift for many to working from home has had a massive impact on this. I noticed that when I had my two little ones that my socialising dramatically changed and had a great impact on my happiness, and not for the better! It is important to bring up social media here - this is not the same. Having a heap of ‘friends’ or interacting with them online doesn’t have quite the same impact.
Your Invitation to a Happier Rituals
So, what does happiness mean to you?
This weekend, light a candle. Take a quiet moment to journal. Map your happiness on a scale from 1 to 10—and reflect on what moves the needle.
Better yet, tag us on Instagram (@scentedfable) and share your rituals or revelations. I’d love to know what lights you up.
Ready to cultivate a little more beauty in your everyday? Join our newsletter below and receive rituals, reflections, and a special welcome gift—just for you.