The Ritual Effect: Why Lighting a Candle is the Most Luxurious Act of All

Since the dawn of civilisation, ritual has been our anchor. From ancient fire pits to gilded cathedrals, us humans have always known that flame, smoke and ritual hold power: whether it’s to steady the heart and soul, to thrive in challenging times and to mark transitions, to invite in, the light and divine.

Now, science is catching up. Harvard’s Professor Michael Norton calls it The Ritual Effect - the way symbolic acts improve performance, soothe grief, and bind us closer together. Neuroscientist Dr Tara Swart goes further, showing how ritual literally rewires the brain: lowering cortisol, strengthening self-worth, and unlocking creativity.

At Scented Fable, this is our foundation, our reason for being. Lighting a candle is never just lighting a candle. It is an invitation to pause, a threshold moment - a spark of presence, strength, intention, and possibility.

Rituals for Performance

You may already have your own rituals and not be fully aware of them. I know that for me, I have created rituals for those moments when I need to stop, to focus and access my strength. Before a boardroom pitch or tricky conversations, having a ritual can feel like wearing armour. Athletes know it. Opera singers know it (in fact a whole lot of celebrities know it!) Even a whispered affirmation, some deep breaths or the selecting of the perfect playlist. Rituals prime us - calming nerves, sharpening focus, and turning uncertainty into something manageable. In uncertain times, this might be the most essential luxury of all. I think that we all need more of that right now don’t we!

Rituals for Wellbeing

Wellness and wellbeing is having a moment right now. Call it mindfulness, but with better lighting. We are all seeking out a little ritual. Simple, everyday acts, your morning coffee, evening skincare can become grounding when done with intention. They connect us to our surroundings, affirm our self-worth, and restore a sense of meaning.

When I was training as a meditation teacher, with a toddler and a newborn, it was micro-rituals that kept me tethered. Not grandiose, but vital. Proof that even in chaos, ritual can restore us. I found delight in adding in small, simple rituals to my practice.

Rituals in Practice

Now, whenever I teach rituals in my workshops, the first thing that I do is to talk about the simplicity in rituals. Don’t go for those that are overcomplicated, that rely on too many moving pieces. Make sure that they are things that genuinely make your heart sing.

Dr Swart (one of my hero’s in this space) recommends rituals as simple as stargazing, as sensual as magnesium baths, or as tactile as cuddling. Sound also matters - chanting, humming, or mantras can slow heartbeats and synchronise brain waves, something both mystics and neuroscientists would call magic. Even having a specific playlist for tricky or focused tasks can help.

Where Science Meets Spirit

Science is giving new names to truths our ancestors already knew: entrainment, intention, connection. But when I think of ritual, I think not of jargon but of stories told and handed down. Of moments of reflection and a gathering of strength.

Last year, while staying at Warwick Castle, I watched my children sit rapt as one of the wonderful Warwick knights wove tales as the sunset, beneath ancient trees. They were enraptured in the moment. Firelight, steel, and story combined into something older than the walls themselves: a ritual of gathering, of imagination, of belonging.

This is the essence of ritual, not superstition, but the art of making the ordinary extraordinary. And in our hurried age, that is perhaps the rarest luxury of all.

✨ Your Invitation: Tonight, light a candle. Pause for three breaths. Whisper an intention, however small. You may find that what begins as wax and flame quickly becomes something else entirely. A spark of awareness, a shift in mood, a reminder that luxury starts within.